There’s a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch, and it’s bringing me out the dark
Finally I can see you crystal clear
Go ahead and sell me out and I’ll lay your shit bare
See how I’ll leave with every piece of you
Don’t underestimate the things that I will do

There’s a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch
And it’s bringing me out the dark

The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless
I can’t help feeling
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)
And you played it to the beat
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

Baby, I have no story to be told
But I’ve heard one of you
And I’m gonna make your head burn
Think of me in the depths of your despair
Making a home down there
As mine sure won’t be shared

The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless
I can’t help feeling
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)
And you played it to the beat
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
We could have had it all
Rolling in the deep
You had my heart inside of your hand
But you played it with a beating

Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow into treasured gold
You pay me back in kind and reap just what you sow

(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)
We could have had it all
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
We could have had it all
(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)
It all, it all, it all
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

We could have had it all
(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)
And you played it to the beat
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)

You could have had it all
(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You’re gonna wish you never had met me)

But you played it
You played it
You played it
You played it to the beat.

Anyway, from time to time, I do have a favorite song and I can listen to that song over and over again for a few days. Right now, my national anthem is The Story, Callie Torres version. Ya la.. I know Callie Torres is not even a real person but I prefer her version to Sara Ramirez [yup, she played Callie Torres] or to the original singer which is Brandi Carlile if I’m not mistaken.

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I’ve been
And how I got to where I am

But these stories don’t mean anything
When you’ve got no one to tell them to
It’s true, I was made for you

I climbed across the mountaintops
Travel across the ocean blue
I cross over lines and I broke all the rules
And baby I broke them all for you

Oh because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
You do, I was made for you

You see the smile that’s on my mouth
It’s hiding the words that don’t come out
All of the friends who think that I’m blessed
They don’t know I’m in this mess

No they don’t know who I really am
And they don’t know what I’ve been through
Like you do, and I was made for you

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I’ve been
And how I got to where I am

Oh but these stories don’t mean anything
When you’ve got no one to tell them to
It’s true, I was made for you
Oh yeah, and it’s true that I was made for you

Day 10 – Mission Accomplished!

Now I’m all yours, I’m not afraid
and you’re all mine, say what they may
and all your love I’ll take to my grave
and all my life starts now

Tear me down they can’t take you out of my thoughts
Under every scar there’s a battle I’ve lost
Will they stop when they see us again?
I can’t stop now I know who I am

Now I’m all yours, I’m not afraid
and you’re all mine, say what they may
and all your love I’ll take to my grave
and all my life starts

I’m all yours, I’m not afraid
and you’re all mine, say what they may
and all your love I’ll take to my grave
and all my life starts starts now

[I'm still in love with Edward Cullen and still pretending to be Bella Swan]

I was a quick wet boy, diving too deep for coins
All of your street light eyes wide on my plastic toys
Then when the cops closed the fair, I cut my long baby hair
Stole me a dog-eared map and called for you everywhere

Have I found you
Flightless bird, jealous, weeping or lost you, american mouth
Big pill looming

Now I’m a fat house cat
Nursing my sore blunt tongue
Watching the warm poison rats curl through the wide fence cracks
Pissing on magazine photos
Those fishing lures thrown in the cold
And clean blood of Christ mountain stream

Have I found you
Flightless bird, grounded, bleeding or lost you, american mouth
Big pill stuck going down

then, a few days ago, i stumbled upon an old friend’s blog (a different friend ya, not the one i mention above). she wrote about her heartbreak, how her husband cheated on her, about all the pain she felt… and suddenly all the puzzle pieces fall into place. i was like… OMG!!! that s*ndal person stole my friend’s husband!!!! Memang jalang sungguh perempuan yg s*ndal itu!!! and the husband is also a pig! Biggest jerk in the whole world!!! i mean, how could he??? how could they do this to her (my friend)??!!! why???? after all she’s been through, all her sacrifice, all her love for him and this is how he repays her? this is how he appreciate all the sacrifice she made for him? I wish i know the answers for all those questions so that i can comfort her. He is supposed to be her guide, after what he has turned her into, but he left her instead!

i’ve known her since i was in primary school. being a few years older than i, i admire her very much. i had a great respect for her because she is one of the rare people who is good in everything she do. oh, wait! let me rephrase that. She’s superbly great in whatever she do! She’s what you would call an all-rounder, an over-achiever. from sports, athletics to martial arts, public-speaking, music, poetry, arts, academics – she excels in everything. she is a valedictorian – i mean, she’s everything! how can you not admire and have respect for a person like that?

if i were in her shoes, i would belasah the husband cukup-cukup bcos she can… jangan main-main….

so, to my dear friend, my heart goes out to you. i know i can never understand your pain, but be strong, leave everything to GOD. Maybe there’s a blessing in disguise. and here’s a song specially for you!

Just shout to the world, So What???!!! I’m A Rock Star!!!

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
Na Na Na Na Na Na

I guess i just lost my husband
I don’t know where he went
So i’m gonna drink my money
I’m not gonna pay his rent (Nope)
I got a brand new attitude
And i’m gonna wear it tonight
I wanna get in trouble
I wanna start a fight

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
I wanna start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
I wanna start a fight

So so what?
I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t need you
And guess what
I’m having more fun
And now that we’re done
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rockstar
I got my rock moves
And i don’t want you tonight

Uh, check my flow, uh

The waiter just took my table
And gave to Jessica Simp- Shit!
I guess i’ll go sit with drum boy
At least he’ll know how to hit
What if this song’s on the radio
Then somebody’s gonna die
I’m gonna get in trouble
My ex will start a fight

Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
He’s gonna start a fight
Na Na Na Na Na Na Na
We’re all gonna get in a fight!

So so what?
I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t need you
And guess what
I’m having more fun
And now that we’re done
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t want you tonight

You weren’t there
You never were
You weren’t all
But thats not fair
I gave you life
I gave my all
You weren’t there
You let me fall

So so what?
I’m still a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t need you
And guess what
I’m having more fun
And now that we’re done (we’re done)
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright(I’m alright),I’m just fine (I’m just fine)
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t want you tonight

No No, No No
I Don’t want you tonight
You weren’t there
I’m gonna show you tonight
I’m alright, I’m just fine
And you’re a tool
So so what?
I am a rock star
I got my rock moves
And i don’t want you tonight

Ba da da da da da

Ppl said women are so complicated, so difficult to understand. I think all human beings are equally complicated.

And to my friend again, if u think i got the story wrong, do let me know, i’ll kindly take this off my blog – but the song stays coz i like it.

P!nk Rocks!!

i don’t know but today, i feel like listening to the soothing sound of ukulele all day long…

here are the top two songs that have been put on repeat mode in my media player… pls bear with me, let me be a hawaiian just for today…

Jason Castro – Somewhere Over The Rainbow

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There’s a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true

Some day I’ll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That’s where you’ll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can’t I?
Some day I’ll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemondrops
Away above the chimney tops
That’s where you’ll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can’t I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can’t I?

Jason Mraz – I’m Yours

ok, this is not ukulele… but it sure sounds like one, so why not??

Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but you’re so hot that I melted
I fell right through the cracks, and I’m tryin’ to get back
Before the cool done run out I’ll be givin it my bestest
and nothin’s gonna stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it’s again my turn to win some or learn some

I won’t hesitate no more,
no more, it cannot wait, I’m yours

Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you’re free
Look into your heart and you’ll find love love love love
Listen to the music of the moment people dance and sing
We’re just one big family and
It’s our god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved Loved

So, I won’t hesitate no more,
no more, it cannot wait I’m sure
there’s no need to complicate our time is short
this is our fate, I’m yours

*scat*

Do you want to come scooch on over closer, dear?
And I will nibble your ear.

I’ve been spendin’ way too long checkin’ my tongue in the mirror
and bendin’ over backwards just to try to see it clearer
but my breath fogged up the glass
and so I drew a new face and I laughed
I guess what I’m a sayin’ is there ain’t no better reason
to rid yourself of vanities and just go with the seasons
It’s what we aim to do
our name is our virtue

But I won’t hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, I’m sure
(There’s no need to complicate
our time is short
it cannot wait, I’m yours 2x)

(No please don’t complicate, our time is short
this is our fate, I’m yours.
no please don’t hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, the sky is yours!)

well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you’re free
look into your heart and you’ll find love love love love
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la one big family
it’s your God-forsaken right to be loved, loved, loved, loved
open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you’re free
look into your heart and you’ll find love love love love
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la happy family
it’s our god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la peaceful melodies
it’s you god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved…

enjoy…!

High school she was that girl that make me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Just to get a peek again, she’s a 10)
High school she was
That girl that make me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Just to get a peek again, she’s a 10)
Never thought she would come and work for the president
Mr. George Washington (where my money at?)
She thought he’d call (where my money at?)
She had a good day, bad day, sunny day, rainy day
All she wanna know is (where my money at?)
Closed legs don’t get fed, go out there and make my bread
All you wanna know is (where my money at?)
She ended up in a road car, bruised up, scarred hard
All you wanna know is (where my money at?)
She thought he’d call (where my money at?)

Cos I’mma tell you like you told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Cos I’mma tell you like you told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)

Pimpin’ got harder cos, hoes got smarter
On the strip is something they don’t wanna be a part of
Rather be up in the club shakin’ for a thug
For triple times the money and spending it how they wanna
They got they mind on they money, money on they mind
They got they finger on the trigger, hand on the nines
See everyday they feel the struggle, but staying on they grind
And ain’t nobody takin’ from us, and that’s the bottom line
But I know there’s a drop in the block
You move slow
You getting’ pressure from cops
you don’t know not to lay low
Because 25 to life is no joke
To all my real gorillas thuggin’
On top of corners every day strugglin’
All the beautiful women getting’ money
Washin’ them dollar bills like laundry

Cos I’mma tell you like you told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Cos I’mma tell you like you told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)

She used to be (she used to be the sweetest girl)
She used to be the sweetest girl ever
Now she like sour ameretta
She wears a dress to the T like the letter
And if you make it rain she will be under the weather
She used to run track back in high school
Now she tricks off the track right by school
She takes a loss cos she don’t wanna see her child lose
So respect her, I’ll pay up for the time used
And then she runs to the pastor
And he tells her there will be a new chapter
But she feels no different after
And then she asks him…

Cos I’mma tell you like you told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Cos I’mma tell you like you told me
Cash rules everything around me
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)
Singin’ dollar dollar bill yall(dollar, dollar bill yall)

anyway, see for yourself and let me know what do you think…

now, we’re left with only the best… for sure it’s going to be tough after this.

Head under water,
And they tell me to breathe easy for a while.
The breathing gets harder, even I know that.

You made room for me but it’s too soon to see,
If I’m happy in your hands.
I’m unusually hard to hold on to.

Blank stares at blank pages.
No easy way to say this.
You mean well, but you make this hard on me.

I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one, you see.
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s,
Make or breaking this.
If you’re on your way,
I’m not gonna write you to stay.
If all you have is leaving,
I’m gonna need a better reason to write you a love song today.
Today.

I learned the hard way,
That they all say things you want to hear.
My heavy heart sinks deep down under you,
And your twisted words, your help just hurts.
You are not what I thought you were.
Hello to high and dry.

Convinced me to please you.
Made me think that I need this too.
I’m trying to let you hear me as I am.

I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one, you see.
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s,
Make or breaking this.
If you’re on your way,
I’m not gonna write you to stay.
If all you have is leaving,
I’m gonna need a better reason to write you a love song today.

Promise me you’ll leave the light on,
To help me see with daylight, my guide, gone.
‘Cause I believe there’s a way you can love me because I say,

I won’t write you a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one you see.
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s make or breaking this.
Is that why you wanted a love song,
‘Cause you asked for it,
‘Cause you need one you see.
I’m not gonna write you a love song,
‘Cause you tell me it’s make or breaking this.
If you’re on your way,
I’m not gonna write you to stay.
If your heart is nowhere in it,
I don’t want it for a minute.
Babe, I’ll walk the seven seas when I believe that there’s a reason to,
Write you a love song today.
Today.

This town is colder now, I think it’s sick of us
It’s time to make our move, I’m shakin off the rust
I’ve got my heart set on anywhere but here
I’m staring down myself, counting up the years
Steady hands, just take the wheel…
And every glance is killing me
Time to make one last appeal for the life I lead

Stop and stare
I think I’m moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I’ve become what I can’t be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you’re here not there
And you’d give anything to get what’s fair
But fair ain’t what you really need
Oh, can you see what I see

They’re tryin to come back, all my senses push
Un-tie the weight bags, I never thought I could…
Steady feet, don’t fail me now
Gonna run till you can’t walk
But something pulls my focus out
And I’m standing down…

Stop and stare
I think I’m moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I’ve become what I can’t be, oh
Stop and stare
You start to wonder why you’re here not there
And you’d give anything to get what’s fair
But fair ain’t what you really need
Oh, you don’t need

What you need, what you need…

Stop and stare
I think I’m moving but I go nowhere
Yeah I know that everyone gets scared
But I’ve become what I can’t be
Oh, do you see what I see…